Being Honest at Three

Isabelle hasn't been feeling very well for a few weeks.  She's had an ear infection and finished antibiotics a week ago.  Since then she has had a super runny nose, been really cranky, really constipated, complains of random itchiness, sore throat, and is occasionally pale.  I'd normally take her back to the doctor, but she hasn't had a fever, plays happily, eats, drinks, and seems normal.  It's so hard to know when a three-year old is really sick or just complaining for attention.  My guess is she just has an old-fashioned winter cold.

So, last night when she was hiding behind a chair, not wanting to go poopy again, I asked her if she would tell me the truth.  I was not ready for the conversation that followed.

Belle questioned, "About cuz I don't wanna poopy?"
I replied, "Yes, and what else is bugging you.  Does anything else not feel good?  Be honest."
Belle, "Well, my froat is kind of yucky and my hair hurts."
Mommy, "Oh, and is there anything else?"
Belle, "Well my ear is not good."
Mommy, "Which one?"
Belle, "This one....no wait, this one."
Mommy, "What does it feel like?"
Belle, "Bugs and bees and stingers and dog stink."

You'd think after seven years as a mommy, I wouldn't be surprised by anything.  All I could do was cover my smile and say, OK.

On a happy note, Belle says she feels really good and all the bugs and bees flew away when I was carrying in the groceries today.

Sticks and Stones

Lately, I've felt so alienated in this world.  I have a wonderful family and really great friends, but outside of my little world everyone seems foreign. As much as I love them, I can't relate to most of my family members and many people I've called friend for years.

I watch the news, sitcoms, talk shows, listen to the radio, see comments on facebook and read Internet articles, all of which are so far from my reality.   I welcome diversity, but feel that the "common truths" our forefathers agreed upon have become so tissue paper thin.  What a life is, is debatable, freedoms are only for the people of great influence and their followers, and trying to be happy seems to be difficult to do without being judged.  I'm constantly on my guard not to offend with my comments or actions.  It's so hard to be myself.  I like me, but I don't set any current standards for normalcy.  My values are definitely not aligned with common ideas.

I feel that today's mentality is to focus on ourselves.  "It's my right to voice my opinion and your opinions are hateful."  "Let someone else help out, I've got my own stuff to do."  "I couldn't possibly do something that mundane, it would stifle me."  It's easy to fall into this trend, but I don't see how looking out for "number one" is making anyone happier.  We were not created to progress as solitary beings.  You might respond, "I'm not alone, I've got tons of people in my life!"  Be honest though, how many of those people could you truly bare your soul to with raw honesty?  One if you're lucky.  Just being truly honest with yourself is painfully uncomfortable.  How can man hope to find progress, if he is the king of his world, but so is everyone else?  How can man be productive if he is the basis of all truth?  Which tomorrow, could change.

I'm not looking to change the world with this little entry on my blog.  I have just been so sad at the state of our world.  I have been so sad for my loved ones, great friends, and neighbors.  I have been so sad for my countrymen, people in the media, politicians, citizens of other countries and world leaders.  I am so sad that it is far more intelligent to stand alone than to stand solidly unified.  Maybe there is such disunity and unrest among people because we are not all anchored into one solid truth.

I was listening to a song that questioned, "What will happen after we're gone?"  I thought about the body that we leave behind and how it's just a shell of who we are.  I've never really been able to feel at home in my own body.  It's awkward, slow, gives me a lot of pain, addictive, and physically inept.  I've always said the true me is looking out through my eyes.  The true me is locked inside this flesh.  I don't need another person, a book, or out of body experience to tell me that there is more to me than Emily, 1977-20??. 

This world makes me feel uncomfortable, sad and alone.  The Truth gives me rest, joy and hope!

Oh What Fun It Is!

Today, I found my constipated three-year old standing next to the potty with toilet paper hanging from between her pinchable cheeks.  She was just standing there, pants at her ankles, leaning on the tank singing "Jingle Bells."  I waited and watched her with a grin until she noticed me.  She jumped with surprise when she saw me and whined, "I don't wanna poopy!"  It's moments like these that I just can't keep a straight face. I think we can learn so much from children.  When there's something we don't want to do, just sing a merry tune and it might not seem so bad.

Thanks for the Sliver of Soap

I need to take a moment to say thank you to all the people who caused my jaw to drop and say, "ah, man!" and occasionally a "come on!"

Thanks, to the guy who watched me try to parallel park between his and another car.  You could have backed up a bit, but no, you stared with bug-eyes that could only mean, "stupid woman's gonna hit my car!"  I don't know what was worse, your demeaning expression or the fact that your car was parked right on the line.  Well, lucky for you I got super nervous and found another spot. 

Thanks, to the person who always leaves just one square of toilet paper.  No, that's not enough.

Thanks, to the guy who wanted my parking spot and watched with his turn signal on while I tried to get my three-year old in the car and loaded my groceries in the freezing rain.  No, you didn't make me super nervous and self-conscious every time I had to bend over.

Thanks, to the lady having a garage sale for selling me broken stuff.  When I ask, "does it work?" please be honest.

Thanks, to the waitress for rolling your eyes when grandma indecisively ordered.  She's lived a long life!  Give her a minute to make a decision.

Thanks, to the parent in the drop-off lane who threw up his hands and gave me a nasty look when I got out to take care of my crying son.

Thanks, to my father-in-law for congratulating my husband on a yummy dinner when I was the one who spent hours in the kitchen.

Thanks, to an acquaintance for telling me I was a plain kind of pretty.

Thanks, to people who wrap tiny presents in big boxes.  I shouldn't have gone out and gotten you another gift.

Thanks, to my oblivion for not noticing what day it was and rushing to the grocery store because all my coupons expired the next day....only to find out they were expired today.

And finally, thanks for the sliver of soap left in the shower this morning...I was all wet by the time I looked. 
 

My first official post worthy of reading....

I wanted to start my blog with something of substance.  I just can't stop thinking about how proud I am to have David as my husband.  Sappy, I know.  "Pride go-eth before a fall," I know.  Sappy and proud are two things I am so uncomfortable with, but that's just going to have to be me today. 

David has been working on starting a children's ministry at the Perrysburg Heights Community Center for at least six months now.  It has been a lot of work and has almost constant set backs.  As of now, he is going once a week to work with children who need help with homework and mentoring.  The reason I find this so impressive will probably embarrass my husband, but hopefully he'll see the awe and respect in what I have to say. 

I wouldn't say David is shy, but he really avoids most social settings.  He is just really uncomfortable talking with people...I tease him for making me call to order the pizza.  So, for my husband to come so far out of his comfort zone and decide he not only wants to help at the community center, but that he also wants to lead a "Kid's Club," I am in awe. 

The point of this post is not only to share my amazement, but to ask for your support.  David's desire to lead this ministry has not been dampened by the many set-backs.  He is happy to wait for God's timing in this.  As of today, he has materials for 6 weeks of lessons, backing from our missions committee at Oak Bend, approval of the community center director, and great mentors from "Kid's Club."  We are waiting on approval of the board at the community center, a time slot opening, three to four volunteers to substitute if there is ever a need, and interest from at least one child and his or her parents.  

Your prayers, encouragement, advice, and interest in helping out would be really wonderful!   

Putting an end to my technology rebellion...

First of all, Mr. Kaiser, this was your idea and if it goes terribly wrong, I will blame you.  Secondly, thank you Google...you have been there for me from finding stupid movie quotes to saving a load of laundry from crayons in the dryer.  How exciting it is to simply type the words, "How do I start a blog" and half an hour later I am writing these inspiring words to all of you fine people. 

I have no idea what will become of my new endeavor.  I might try to inspire, make you laugh, share something yummy I cooked, or tell you about my family.  So far...I got nuthin'